AIMIE!!
First of all, HUGS! Second, I'm RIGHT there with you. I don't know if you read my thread before (about a week ago??) about how I had a proposal for david. I'm so sad that the last time I was pg, I didn't enjoy it more, as I LOVE being pregnant, and I always wanted 4 (what in the hell was I thinking??), dh wanted 2, and we decided on 3..
That was all back before all the pg drama. If you count Hope, we DO have 3, we have 2 on earth though, two VERY healthy beautiful girls, and I am so greateful for that. I have been pregnant 5 times... My friend was telling me about a couple who had 9 boys, and they kept trying JUST for a girl, and their last child had lots of complications, and has ended up deaf and blind, and in a wheelchair. That has got to be soooooooooo difficult!
Anyway, I can't make the decision FINAL until I know that we **COULD** have gotten pg, so I asked david not to pull outuntil June (sorry for the TMI). If/when I get my period in July, I'll make an appointment to get my tubes tied (the reason ME, is because 1. dh is ADAMENT on not having any more, and 2. PG is really rough on my body, and I KNOW I won't have anymore). This way, we give it one last chance, and if it doesn't happen, the that's perfectly OK with us. He sounded like he agreed, but we haven't DTD since (lol...ha ha ha) so I don't know if he's REALY all aboard or not.
I do have my hands full. I often wonder if it's because we have NO room in this house, and that we're always tripping over eachother and can't go outside and play without DRIVING somewhere to do it. Would I be happy with a 3rd, oh yes, very! would I be happy without a 3rd, YES!
It's a very BIG decision. I'm more worried about haing a child with severe chromosomal problems than anything else. hope had a VERY severe case of turner syndrome, and then the 2 other miscarriages weren't caused by anything wrong with my body, and they say it was probably chromosonal.
I do have friends that have been suffering through infertilty for almost 5 years!
I have told them before I would be their serrogate, and I would be in an instant! If they ever decide that they want me to be, i'll totally do it! I love being pregnant! I"m not sure I could handle another child added to this family, though.
It makes me sad that I have a box of maternity clothes in my closet, and a brand new breast pump. I bought them in August when I found out I was pg, and I more than likely would have had the baby in March.... so, it's gonna be a hard march/april for me, but i'm TRYING to not think about it.
HUGS!!!