Aimie

some of you may remember my drama of... to have another baby now or to wait to have another baby for a few years or no more babies. well, this week (having been here with the boys while dh is away for work) i have decided and dh is totally or board with this by the way (big suprise) that i am done.

no more kids for me. unless god has another plan and before we break down and get dh the big V ( i won't go on bcp due to complications the last time and condoms suck ) but we had no babies due to oops' in 8 years so i think we got the pull out thing down. lol. being here with the boys i have realized how perfectly chaotic it is and fullfilled i feel with 2 healthy and happy boys ( YES, they are a pita especially billy lately. lol), but they are my pitas... yes, a girl would have been great but... granddaughters are even better and hey, i can spoil them and not have to deal with the concequences. he he.

so aimie and josh have 2 beautiful little boys and are a complete family unit. it does seem a little sad to me how i wasn't around for what is ending up as our last baby as much as i would have wanted but i hope being home now makes up for the year i had to support the family. as i am typing this i am crying not because i am sad to be done, but that i am satisfied with the decision that i made the right choice for my family. having a 3rd would have been a totally selfish move and had we gone through with it i fear i may have felt regret with either outcome... boy (well, it figures we should have just stopped at two...) and girl ( yeah... mommy got her wish who is her fave now...) not that i know i would feel that way but i fear that i could and that isn't fair to any children. i love billy and matty and they are so sweet and loving and funny and rowdy... i cant imagine throwing the balance we have in our lives now completely off.

if you made it through all of that BLESS YOU it feels nice to let it out and finally not be thinking what if... maybe in 2 years i always said kids done by 30 and i stuck with it. now.... just explaining this to our parents... that will be interesting...

did anyone out there in yada land have to have this discussion or should we just avoid untill the subject comes up?

__________________




ticker gone.... we're staying in washington!!!

gateachermom

Aimie, you are living my life, I swear! We were finished after 2 boys too b/c we really thought our family was complete. DH still hasn't gotten a vasectomy (I really want him too) and I am not on bc. We use a condom b/c I am hoping that it will convince him to get it done. Putting it in God's hands is the best thing for you to do. He knows what the future holds, and who knows, you might end up with a little suprise package one day like we did. If not, then you can rest assured that the Lord did what was best for your family.
Now, if your hubby can just get mine on board for the big V!

__________________


Mason, age 14
Dawson, age 10
Jackson, age 4

aliena73

We told my in laws back when we were TTC Halen that we just wanted one. They think that's great, but it's the freakin' strangers that are so nosy! I have a neighbor that is always like "You need to have another, you need to have another." She has three, and not one lives with her. Blech.
Congrats on coming to peace with your decision.

__________________

shannon_b13

You don't have to say anything unless someone brings it up.

BTW, my dh had a vasectomy in December 05. I've seen him in more pain from a pulled muscle.

__________________
Shannon

aliena73

Meant to add some ((hugs)) in there too!
FTR I was saying blech not because she has three children, but because all 3 live with different relatives and she truly believes she is an authority in child rearing. (And she also says all this w/ a cigarette hanging out the side of her mouth.)

__________________

princessandpea

Aimie, I'm so glad that the decision is clear in your head now! (My head is still in a fog on the one more or done issue.)

You have two adorable, little men to raise and I can tell you this. My husband and his brother were terrors growing up (crawling out naked onto the second story roof at age two, breaking all the windows in their neighbor's garage, making the babysitters cat disappear for two weeks when she kept them overnight for one night... yikes, talk about pitas!), but have always been there to support eachother, stick up for one another, and are now the best of friends. They have such a cool relationship and I can't imagine it any other way. I am sure Billy and Matthew will have that same kind of love/sometimes hate relationship, but in the end, will be best buddies, and there is nothing better than that!

__________________
Stacey

shaysbabygirls

AIMIE!!

First of all, HUGS! Second, I'm RIGHT there with you. I don't know if you read my thread before (about a week ago??) about how I had a proposal for david. I'm so sad that the last time I was pg, I didn't enjoy it more, as I LOVE being pregnant, and I always wanted 4 (what in the hell was I thinking??), dh wanted 2, and we decided on 3..

That was all back before all the pg drama. If you count Hope, we DO have 3, we have 2 on earth though, two VERY healthy beautiful girls, and I am so greateful for that. I have been pregnant 5 times... My friend was telling me about a couple who had 9 boys, and they kept trying JUST for a girl, and their last child had lots of complications, and has ended up deaf and blind, and in a wheelchair. That has got to be soooooooooo difficult!

Anyway, I can't make the decision FINAL until I know that we **COULD** have gotten pg, so I asked david not to pull outuntil June (sorry for the TMI). If/when I get my period in July, I'll make an appointment to get my tubes tied (the reason ME, is because 1. dh is ADAMENT on not having any more, and 2. PG is really rough on my body, and I KNOW I won't have anymore). This way, we give it one last chance, and if it doesn't happen, the that's perfectly OK with us. He sounded like he agreed, but we haven't DTD since (lol...ha ha ha) so I don't know if he's REALY all aboard or not.

I do have my hands full. I often wonder if it's because we have NO room in this house, and that we're always tripping over eachother and can't go outside and play without DRIVING somewhere to do it. Would I be happy with a 3rd, oh yes, very! would I be happy without a 3rd, YES!

It's a very BIG decision. I'm more worried about haing a child with severe chromosomal problems than anything else. hope had a VERY severe case of turner syndrome, and then the 2 other miscarriages weren't caused by anything wrong with my body, and they say it was probably chromosonal.

I do have friends that have been suffering through infertilty for almost 5 years! I have told them before I would be their serrogate, and I would be in an instant! If they ever decide that they want me to be, i'll totally do it! I love being pregnant! I"m not sure I could handle another child added to this family, though.

It makes me sad that I have a box of maternity clothes in my closet, and a brand new breast pump. I bought them in August when I found out I was pg, and I more than likely would have had the baby in March.... so, it's gonna be a hard march/april for me, but i'm TRYING to not think about it.

HUGS!!!

__________________
Shay:

London 6/13/03
Robynne 7/1/05

LovinMy2Boys

Sara I could I could written your post exactly! We are doing all of the same things and I really would like for DH to get the big V but he wont do it. When people ask if we are going to have another, I say "We dont plan on having anymore children. We are happy with our 2 boys." I say that because although DH and I dont plan on anymore, you never know what God has planned for you. And why is it when you have two boys everyone expects you to try for a girl??? I am extremely happy having my boys! (sorry for the little rant there! lol)

All of our family knows we are done and I am not shy about letting them know if they ask. My sil has said to me, "well you didnt get your tubes tied so you never know, you might change your mind." I told her, "No I wont, I am done. I have my hands very full with my two boys." Besides now I have a niece to spoil, so who needs another when I can spoil her like crazy and send her back home! It is kind of sad to know I wont have another little bundle to kiss and love on but that is more that I can share with the 2 I have now!

__________________
April