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Thread: Would you flip out too?

  1. 11-21-09 12:00 PM #1
    IslandSweetie
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    They call me quiet girl, but I'm a riot yeah IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie's Avatar

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    Would you flip out too?

    I can't believe the blow up DH and I had.

    Before we got him an iPhone, I really wanted one but we couldn't afford it at the time to get us BOTH an iPhone... so he was the only one to get one and we agreed we would "share". We agreed then that I could use the phone too. In other conversations we were talking about him maybe staying with special warfare commands & he said he wasn't sure how I would handle it because I need to know information (because of our trust issues) and he wouldn't be able to tell me stuff if he did.

    So I said "I'll trust you so long as you don't give me a reason to NOT trust you. If there is a paper on the entry way table... don't freak out on me if I pick it up. Don't freak out if I touch your phone... basically don't suddenly freak out on me for no apparent reason." We've been married for 10 years, everything has been pretty open. He could easily pick up my phone & check it, I don't freak out if he goes into my wallet to get money... its no big deal.

    Also, before I got an iPhone too, I could pick up his phone, play games and the biggest thing he ever said was "Don't run the battery down"

    Then I got one & when we were on our way TO the commissary, I picked up his phone to set up a grocery list (thats where we put it)... I could see on the main screen and said "Hey you have 3 racing notifications"... so he took the phone from me saying "Why are you looking at my phone?"

    Then on our way home from the commissary, his phone was in the console between us, he went to tip the bagger later & I picked it up cause I like to see what apps he has cause he always seems to find cool games that I want to try.

    Well towards the end I found 2 apps... those bikini type apps, so I looked at it. He gets back in and I say "Oh, now I know why you didn't want me to look at your phone" jokingly and he gets all mad cause he sees what I saw.

    I wasn't bothered, most I was going to do was tease him a little bit... but he was FURIOUS.

    He basically told me he wants his own privacy and I told him I didn't see why all of a sudden he is flipping out, after all of our conversations. He accused me of snooping, etc, etc.

    And when we got home he went to get his phone and I said "Yeah, you better get it cause I might look at it again." So he stormed off & grabbed his car keys leaving me and the kids to unload the groceries ourselves.

    I don't know... I just don't get it. Things are pretty open with us. I asked him why he is flipping out on me & he just says its because I have no reason to be looking at his stuff & he doesn't look at mine.

    But I don't care if he looks at mine. My email is already logged in on the computer. And just a few months ago it wasn't an issue.

    Do you think this is really an issue of him wanting privacy or is something else going on?


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  2. 11-21-09 01:02 PM #2
    Aimie
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    is a work in progress!!!!! Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie's Avatar

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    Re: Would you flip out too?

    all i know is what i read above i don't know any of ya'll history, but something seems off to me to get that upset. josh got mad at me a few days ago and said he felt like i didn't trust him cuz i kept getting and looking through his texts. i wasn't being secretive about it i'd see texts from the guys at work and ask questions about like... wow, why was michael so pissed at so and so. and he told me he felt like i wasn't trusting him by doing that and at that moment i stopped cuz i do trust him i am just bored i guess. lol. so i stopped but there was no blow up about it.

    if he had blown up i'd have prolly thought something was off and been concerned as you are. i hope ya'll can get to the bottom of it. sorry
    Aimie














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  3. 11-21-09 04:20 PM #3
    *~Andrea~*
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    Yada, Yada, Yada *~Andrea~* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” *~Andrea~* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” *~Andrea~* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” *~Andrea~* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” *~Andrea~* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” *~Andrea~* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” *~Andrea~* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” *~Andrea~* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” *~Andrea~* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” *~Andrea~* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” *~Andrea~* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.”
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    Re: Would you flip out too?

    Well, when I flipped out on Jim for checking my phone, there was something going on, so I don't know. Without knowing him, you know?

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  4. 11-21-09 04:40 PM #4
    IslandSweetie
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    They call me quiet girl, but I'm a riot yeah IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie's Avatar

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    Re: Would you flip out too?

    Yeah but did he suspect something was going on first?

    The thing with me is... If something WAS going on... he certainly doesn't call or text this person... or email cause I get the bill. And he's usually always home unless for some reason he really isn't working when he says he is - but I believe him, whenever his work phone rings its usually a guy.

    So if he is cheating, that would be a shock to me - but just by his reaction I'm starting to wonder.


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  5. 11-21-09 04:49 PM #5
    Tina
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    It's ok Rob...you make me sweaty, too xoxo Tina knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Tina knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Tina knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Tina knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Tina knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Tina knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Tina knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Tina knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Tina knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Tina knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Tina knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.”

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    Re: Would you flip out too?

    i'd be worried, but then again i do worry and tend to be paranoid anyway lol...it is odd to me that all of a sudden he is protective and wants privacy, when he wasnt before. my dh is very open and lets me look through his phone or emails if i want, but i rarely do, occasionally i will look at his texts or when it goes off open it if i am there or bored, but he never freaks. i do the same with him with my phone and both our emails are saved on our computer.

    have you been worrying more lately or fighting over things like this? like causing him to stress out and feel like he is being 'watched' or accused all the time...perhaps that could make him suddenly go the 'other way' and get angry if he thinks you are always thinking he is cheating or something kwim when he isnt. thats the only thing i can think of though....men can be weird. {{hugs}} girl.

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  6. 11-21-09 04:54 PM #6
    IslandSweetie
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    They call me quiet girl, but I'm a riot yeah IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie's Avatar

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    Re: Would you flip out too?

    Honestly no... but we did get into a DUMB fight yesterday too.

    I wanted to take Malia to see New Moon when she got home from school... so DH comes home all happy, early even. And I tell him about the movie plans & he gets upset saying "Oh great, now we don't get to eat dinner till late"

    So I say "Ok, lets eat dinner now"

    And he didn't want to, so I fell asleep since I couldn't win either way.
    Then his phone rang for work and then he got me up to make dinner. I asked him what his deal was and he said it always seems like I have money to do what I want to do but he never does, so I asked him to TELL me what he wants to do and bring these things up.

    Eventually we settled that I would see a movie with Malia & he would watch a video on demand movie with the other kids... then when I was on my way home I'd pick up chips/dip and alcohol. So I did... we were happy.

    I don't know, just feels like this marriage is high maintenance. I've been busy with work & school lately so I have been seeing him less and less or at least less attentive. He tells me all the time I don't listen to him (which I am really preoccupied).

    I just wish he could communicate in a better way with me than simply getting angry or deflecting his anger to some other stupid issue.


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  7. 11-21-09 05:59 PM #7
    Lovefam6
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    Life is all about the little things. Lovefam6 knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Lovefam6 knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Lovefam6 knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Lovefam6 knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Lovefam6 knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Lovefam6 knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Lovefam6 knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Lovefam6 knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Lovefam6 knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Lovefam6 knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Lovefam6 knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Lovefam6's Avatar

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    Re: Would you flip out too?

    I would expect nothing less than his reaction. It is completely unacceptable to check someone's phone, unless they've told you to do so. I'd snap. He's most likely not cheating, he just feels disrespected by the one person who's supposed to be his better half. Wow, that sounds harsh . Summer, I mean that in the most loving way possible (((hugs))).

    I would probably apologize for looking at his phone and tell him that I will respect his privacy. I'd also explain that you truly didn't realize it was a big deal since you used to be able to use his phone all the time. I'd ask what changed?
    Dacia
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  8. 11-21-09 06:09 PM #8
    IslandSweetie
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    They call me quiet girl, but I'm a riot yeah IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie's Avatar

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    Re: Would you flip out too?

    Coming from you Dacia, I completely understand.

    Who knows when I'll actually see him again... I don't know how I come off here but I can be a real bitch. I escalated the argument while we were in the car & even went as far as to say "Well, do you want to start paying your own bills too?" and start separating things into his and mine so he can have his own space. We share a lot, and I'm left to manage a lot of his stuff.... paying bills, managing his retirement accts, etc. Since this whole "don't touch the phone" thing is new... what other boundaries does he want? Its not like I search his car or nightstand. He acted like he had no privacy.

    Then when we got home with the van full of groceries, he just got in his car and left. So the kids & I had to unload it... and I called him telling him to not come home tonight.

    In all fairness though, I am tired of him just upping and leaving anytime he has a temper tantrum. We get into a fight like this once a year... and I think he does it to hurt me, but really - as it keeps going on, I'm finding that it hurts me in a different way. The more he leaves, the more I don't want him to come back cause I'm tired of this.... not that I really WANT him to leave, but I'm tired of having to be afraid of pissing him off so much he takes off w/o saying goodbye. Feels like it would be less painful to just be done or at least argue like adults.

    Or maybe thats just me trying to protect myself from getting hurt, but he doesn't have to worry about me snooping anymore. I'm just ready to address this or be done cause I'm tired... I'm getting too old to deal with this. He could have simply just stated what his boundaries were.
    Last edited by IslandSweetie; 11-21-09 at 06:14 PM.


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  9. 11-21-09 06:16 PM #9
    Aimie
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    is a work in progress!!!!! Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie's Avatar

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    Re: Would you flip out too?

    Quote Originally Posted by Lovefam6 View Post
    I would expect nothing less than his reaction. It is completely unacceptable to check someone's phone, unless they've told you to do so.


    REALLY?!?!?!? i disagree completely i think in a marriage it is what's mine is yours and whats yours is mine. if it were a sister or a mother or a freinds phone i could see how that would be unacceptable, but your husbands phone?!?!?! and can i assume that when/if you teen has a phone you wouldn't dare touch that either? sorry i don't agree but the beauty of a mb is that we don't have to. i just think that's kind of an over the top thing to freak out about.
    Aimie














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  10. 11-21-09 06:19 PM #10
    *~Andrea~*
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    Yada, Yada, Yada *~Andrea~* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” *~Andrea~* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” *~Andrea~* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” *~Andrea~* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” *~Andrea~* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” *~Andrea~* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” *~Andrea~* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” *~Andrea~* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” *~Andrea~* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” *~Andrea~* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” *~Andrea~* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.”
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    Re: Would you flip out too?

    Quote Originally Posted by IslandSweetie View Post
    Yeah but did he suspect something was going on first?

    .
    Yes, he did and that's why he checked.

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  11. 11-21-09 06:56 PM #11
    Lovefam6
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    Life is all about the little things. Lovefam6 knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Lovefam6 knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Lovefam6 knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Lovefam6 knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Lovefam6 knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Lovefam6 knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Lovefam6 knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Lovefam6 knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Lovefam6 knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Lovefam6 knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Lovefam6 knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Lovefam6's Avatar

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    Re: Would you flip out too?

    Aimie, I"m LMAO over here. Of course I'll be checking my children's phone b/c I won't flippin' trust them to make intelligent decisions. Glad to know you put your children and your husband in the same category. Family, check.

    Summer, I hope you didn't miss the last sentence. I would want to know what's changed. If it had always been acceptable to check it, and now it's not, WHY? When he asked you why you were looking at his phone, I think that let you know he didn't want you doing it and would have been a perfect opportunity to calmly ask him what was going on that he was upset about. The fact that you picked it up again , seems like you were looking for something and that's probably what he thought, even if you weren't. I shouldn't have replied that way to your thread and I'm sorry. I was answering the thread title instead of being compassionate to you, which is what you needed. I'm sorry I missed that and that your impression of me is that's common. I think very highly of you and am amazed at all you've handled and dealt with. (((Hugs)))
    Dacia
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  12. 11-21-09 07:37 PM #12
    Aimie
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    is a work in progress!!!!! Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie's Avatar

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    Re: Would you flip out too?

    dacia... just wondering cuz you said... It is completely unacceptable to check someone's phone, unless they've told you to do so.

    and i doubt you teenagers would tell you to do so. lol.
    Aimie














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  13. 11-21-09 08:51 PM #13
    peg
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    (209): "kindergarten is hard when you're hung over"~TFLN peg knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” peg knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” peg knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” peg knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” peg knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” peg knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” peg knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” peg knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” peg knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” peg knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” peg knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.”
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    Re: Would you flip out too?

    I think maybe he just was embarrassed by the app? Talk to him. You haven't had a lot of time together of late it sounds like, and maybe he is feeling disconnected from you. I wouldn't make a mountain out of a mole hill. If you have no other reasons to mistrust him, I wouldn't start now. And yes the temper tantrum is too much!

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  14. 11-21-09 10:24 PM #14
    IslandSweetie
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    They call me quiet girl, but I'm a riot yeah IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie's Avatar

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    Re: Would you flip out too?

    Well I think I know what changed... I just looked at his iTunes history and on the 19th is when he downloaded all the naughty apps


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  15. 11-21-09 11:27 PM #15
    Elizabeth
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    Re: Would you flip out too?

    We've got trust issues too, and I reserve the right to look at anything I want at any time. He can too, but doesn't. Actually, I don't anymore either, or haven't in a very long time.

    I would tend to believe that there's nothing special going on, he's just in a mood. I agree with Dacia, ask him what changed.

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  16. 11-22-09 08:34 AM #16
    AliKS
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    I am owned by Vickie AliKS knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” AliKS knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” AliKS knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” AliKS knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” AliKS knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” AliKS knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” AliKS knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” AliKS knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” AliKS knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” AliKS knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” AliKS knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” AliKS's Avatar
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    Re: Would you flip out too?

    I get pissed when dh tries to get on my macbook, probably cause I have a private forum and there's sensitive stuff on there. He's a booger and likes to put a gross picture up as the background. But a phone? Seems weird if it was fine before to play with it.
    Ali, mama to Tony 8/23/05 and Gemma Lynn 9/04/08


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  17. 11-22-09 10:21 AM #17
    Aimie
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    is a work in progress!!!!! Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” Aimie's Avatar

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    Re: Would you flip out too?

    see i don't have an iphone but our kids like to make secret i love you mommy/daddy videos with our phones (it is awesome when you find emtoo) so having naughty apps would be a no go in my house for the kids. i'd hate for one of them to find that stuff on there.
    Aimie














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  18. 11-22-09 04:45 PM #18
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    Re: Would you flip out too?

    My boyfriend and I have been together about 5 years. We don't read texts or emails, but if I look through his phone at apps, no problems. If I leave my gmail up on the screen without logging out, I know he's not going to read it.

    That said, I do find this a little odd. If you aren't reading emails or messages, he shouldn't get defensive. I don't see this about you trusting him, it's more about him trusting you. He shouldn't assume you are snooping through private things unless you've given him reason to think otherwise in the past. He needs to trust that you can look at games and apps without violating his communication with others.

    That said, there could be a very innocent reason too. When my BF was flipping out about me seeing his email once, it was because he was hiding a present for the holidays. He didn't want me knowing what it was or having the surprise ruined. So don't assume the worst without talking!
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  19. 11-22-09 05:02 PM #19
    IslandSweetie
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    They call me quiet girl, but I'm a riot yeah IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie agrees with Abe Lincoln: Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. IslandSweetie's Avatar

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    Re: Would you flip out too?

    Well, we talked this morning and I think the situation was just prime for an argument because he's really been upset about a lot of stuff lately & he was already agitated cause he HATES going to the commissary.

    Basically I think it relates to our communication skills. He's very attentive and helpful around the house, probably more than most husbands. He's not doting, but he is very helpful. He does the laundry, take care of the pets, mow the lawn, he makes dinner half the time, and when he gets into his cleaning modes he REALLY cleans.

    Anyhow, with me so busy with work & school and everything going on, I haven't really been paying attention to him. So not only does he do a lot around the house, he feels like I don't listen to him when he tells me about his day or what he wants... Honestly, I sometimes feel like I'm the guy in the relationship because this is a complaint my friends have about their husbands.

    But because he feels like I don't listen to him, that sparks him to get upset more over nothing.

    So we agreed that he would work on trying to be more assertive versus getting angry at things, and I would work on being more attentive to him. He did put a passcode on his phone but I don't think he's really hiding anything other than just being embarrassed about the apps. I get the cell phone bill, I don't really need to search his phone... and the only person he calls with the cell phone is me.


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  20. 11-22-09 07:14 PM #20
    *Robyn*
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    Can't believe my baby's 3 months old! *Robyn* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” *Robyn* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” *Robyn* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” *Robyn* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” *Robyn* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” *Robyn* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” *Robyn* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” *Robyn* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” *Robyn* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” *Robyn* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” *Robyn* knows that Euripedes is right: Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom.” *Robyn*'s Avatar

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    Re: Would you flip out too?

    Even with the history, I would just pass it off as him being in a bad mood. They get irritated over the weirdest things, even things we do ALL THE TIME, so I would think it was just one of those. I wouldn't immediately suspect him of cheating or even doing anything wrong. Just having a jerk day.
    Mommy to Anna, 6.5; Ilse, 5; Gideon, 4; Merrick, 2; and Liam


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  21. 11-23-09 09:47 AM #21
    tiffnmoose
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    I think you just have to consider your relationship "norm". Personally my DH and I don't care about phones/computers/bills we know all the passwords for everything and neither of us really cares if the other goes into something that is considered mine.. I have nothing to hide, I don't care. Same with him. And we tell each other very personal things so that wouldn't be a issue either. So if he all the sudden flipped I would be highly suspect and would be asking tons of questions, because it would be so out of character for him

    But my brother and his wife like the privacy from each other and I can see my brother going off on my SIL if she did the same thing and vice versa, but that is their "norm"

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